


Alone

by its_waei



Series: Gay Adventures of JJP [2]
Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: I don't want to spoil this, M/M, Memory Loss, Park Jinyoung | Jr.-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 11:53:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13053480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/its_waei/pseuds/its_waei
Summary: Everything was fine.Until it wasn't.





	Alone

**Author's Note:**

> i am sorry pls forgive me

Jinyoung's eyes flutter open. He is just conscious enough to realize that his human heater, Jaebum, isn't holding him like he usually does in the mornings. Jinyoung spreads out his arms on the bed in search of the familiar warmth that Jaebum provides and frowns when he realizes that his boyfriend isn't there. Jinyoung sits up and looks around the room. Soft golden early morning sunlight peeks through the blinds that cover the window. The rays cover the white walls of their bedroom in a muted golden hue. Jaebum is no where to be found. 

Jinyoung lets out a sigh. They have both been really busy lately. Jaebum with running a mildly successful photography business along with modeling on the side and Jinyoung with his pretty adequate writing career. They both are out working at their respective jobs until late hours of the night. They try to make time to hang out and relax or go to dinner but even that is a rarity. 

Jinyoung sleepily rubs his eyes and gets out of bed. He grabs his phone and goes to the kitchen. He is in the middle of making his morning coffee when he notices a note stuck on the fridge. 

Jinyoungie,  
Sorry to leave so early but i was called in to do a last minute photo shoot for a magazine. I will be home around 2.  
I love you baby~  
Jaebum 

Jinyoung sighs again and looks at the clock on the stove. 

9 a.m. 

Jinyoung looks around the apartment and decides that since he doesn't have a deadline to meet for his publisher this week, he will clean. The apartment isn't messy. It's actually pretty clean for a place where 2 men in their 20's live. There are just little things that are dirty. Like the light layer of dust that has settled on the living room because no one really uses it anymore or the dishes that are starting to pile up in the kitchen. Any ways, Jinyoung has made it his mission to clean the whole apartment and make it nice and clean for Jaebum when he comes home. 

A couple hours later and Jinyoung finally finished cleaning. He takes a look around and smiles to himself. Spotless, he thinks to himself. He even lit some of Jaebum's favorite candles so the apartment will smell nice when Jaebum gets home. 

Jinyoung looks at the clock and sees that he still has a lot of time left and decides to catch up on the drama that he is currently watching. It's an hour or so later and Jinyoung has cried 3 times. He had forgotten how emotional this show makes him. Jinyoung sniffles and reaches over to grab a few tissues from the box on the end table next to the couch. He blows his nose loudly and gets up to throw away the tissue. He looks at the clock on the wall as he makes his way to the kitchen. 

12:50 p.m. 

Only an hour left before Jaebummie comes home, he thinks giddily. He feels kind of gross after his whole crying fest so he heads to their bedroom and grabs new lazy clothes to change into and then makes his way to the bathroom. Jinyoung turns on the shower and waits for it to heat up. When he deems it warm enough he quickly strips and steps into the shower. The hot water hits his bare back and Jinyoung sighs contently. He wastes a few minutes just standing under the spray and lets the hot water warm him up. Jinyoung has always had really bad blood circulation so he is cold all the time. That's why he always craves Jaebum's warmth. The older male is so warm all of the time and Jinyoung loves to have the mans arms wrapped around him and his body heat keeping him warm. 

Jinyoung decides to use Jaebum's body wash this time after he washes his hair with his favorite strawberry shampoo. He knows Jaebum loves it when he smells like him. Jaebum has always found ways to stake his claim on Jinyoung. Whether it may be leaving love bites all over his neck, insisting that Jinyoung wear his clothes when they go places, or when he urges Jinyoung to use his soap instead of the vanilla scented on that Jinyoung has become very fond of. Jinyoung doesn't mind any of this though. In fact, he loves knowing that he is Jaebum's. But what he loves better is knowing that Jaebum is his too. He loves when he accompanies Jaebum to photo shoots, on the rare occasions that Jaebum isn't behind the camera, and sees the long red scratches on his back when he pulls off his shirt to change outfits. He also loves when he sees how jealous other models get when they see them eating lunch together when Jaebum is on break during a shoot. He knows that he is a touchy person, and Jaebum knows too, but he can't help but be extra touchy just to show the girls that stare too longingly at Jaebum when he is ordering them to do poses and such that Jaebum is HIS. You can call Jinyoung possessive. He won't care because Jaebum is the same way and they are both fine with it. They never get too carried away with it.

Jinyoung steps out of the shower and and dries off and slips into the new clothes. He heads out of the bathroom and is shocked to see that it is almost 2 already. I must have lost track of time, he thinks. He shrugs his shoulders and sits down to watch another episode of the drama. He is about to start another episode when the doorbell rings. That's weird, he thinks, Jaebum has a key. who could that be? 

Jinyoung gets up and opens the door and is greeted with the worried face of Jackson. "What are you doing here?" Jinyoung asks with a tilt of his head. "You always forget what day this is ever year" Jackson says sadly. Jinyoung gets even more confused. What day could it be, he thinks to himself, is not our anniversary. What else could it be?

Jackson pushes past Jinyoung to go stand in the living room. "Please sit down Jinyoungie" Jackson says softly and Jinyoung slowly walks over to the couch and sits down. "What's going on Jackson? You are acting really weird" Jinyoung says. He is worried now. Jackson looks so sad. What could have happened? 

Jackson pulls an old newspaper out from behind his back and hands it to Jinyoung. The title reads:

Man Shot by Gunman During a Robbery at Local Store.

All of a sudden the memories come back. They hit Jinyoung like a slap in the face. The phone call. Jinyoung running to his car. The hospital. Jaebum being rushed to the emergency room. The sympathetic faces of the doctor telling him that "There was nothing we could do". Jinyoung yelling at the doctor that he could have saved him. Jackson running into the waiting room to hold him back fro punching the doctor. Jinyoung not leaving his room for days for fear that the scent of Jaebum would leave and never return. 

Jinyoung barely registers that Jackson is holding him while he cries into his chest. "It will be okay Jinyoung. It will be okay." Jackson whispers into the top of his head. 

"Can you please leave." Jinyoung says softly after while. Jackson nods and grabs the newspaper and shuts the front door behind him softly. Jinyoung gets up and looks around the apartment. He should have remembered. He once read an article that said the brain will sometimes block traumatic memories. Jinyoung walks numbly to the kitchen. It felt so real. It felt like he was still there. Jinyoung looks at the note on the fridge again. The edges are frayed and it had started to roll in on itself. Jinyoung doesn't have the heart to take it down. Jinyoung stumbles his way to the bedroom. He looks around and a hiccuped sob leaves him at the sight of Jaebum's camera on their shared work desk. Jinyoung slumps to the floor. Sob after sob escapes his mouth. He screams and pounds his fists on the floor. He screams for him to come home. To come back to him. To come home and wrap his warm arms around him and whisper "I love you" into his ear. To be alive. Jinyoung screams until he can't anymore. When he stops screaming he just sits there and stares at the camera on the desk. That's where Jackson finds him hours later. Jinyoung vaguely registers being placed on the bed and tucked in. He can't feel anything. He is just staring blankly at the wall in front of him. He falls asleep with his face buried in Jaebum's pillow. 

-

People who know Jinyoung or know author Jinyoung say that ever since that day that he has never been the same. He hasn't released a new book in forever and he never leaves his apartment.The media says that a piece of him died on that day.

And if you ask Jinyoung,

he'll agree.

**Author's Note:**

> i made myself cry with this. i promise that this was supposed to be cute and domestic idk what happened


End file.
